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BS: First Joke Thread of 2017

Georgiansilver 23 Jul 17 - 06:55 AM
Jim Carroll 23 Jul 17 - 03:28 AM
Mrrzy 23 Jul 17 - 12:22 AM
michaelr 22 Jul 17 - 08:19 PM
Donuel 22 Jul 17 - 12:29 PM
Jim Carroll 22 Jul 17 - 03:26 AM
Donuel 21 Jul 17 - 07:56 PM
Steve Shaw 21 Jul 17 - 05:50 PM
Steve Shaw 21 Jul 17 - 03:16 PM
Donuel 21 Jul 17 - 03:05 PM
saulgoldie 21 Jul 17 - 12:43 PM
Steve Shaw 21 Jul 17 - 09:27 AM
Andrez 21 Jul 17 - 08:59 AM
Donuel 21 Jul 17 - 06:28 AM
Andrez 21 Jul 17 - 01:06 AM
Steve Shaw 20 Jul 17 - 06:57 PM
Donuel 20 Jul 17 - 01:28 PM
Andrez 20 Jul 17 - 09:09 AM
Steve Shaw 20 Jul 17 - 08:12 AM
Donuel 20 Jul 17 - 08:12 AM
Ernest 20 Jul 17 - 04:15 AM
BobL 20 Jul 17 - 03:31 AM
Steve Shaw 19 Jul 17 - 08:39 PM
Steve Shaw 19 Jul 17 - 08:36 PM
Andrez 19 Jul 17 - 07:51 PM
Joe_F 19 Jul 17 - 05:36 PM
Donuel 19 Jul 17 - 11:59 AM
Donuel 17 Jul 17 - 02:02 PM
Jim Carroll 17 Jul 17 - 10:02 AM
Donuel 17 Jul 17 - 09:11 AM
Donuel 17 Jul 17 - 07:58 AM
Steve Shaw 17 Jul 17 - 07:27 AM
Georgiansilver 17 Jul 17 - 06:57 AM
Jim Carroll 17 Jul 17 - 06:03 AM
Jim Carroll 16 Jul 17 - 08:32 AM
Steve Shaw 16 Jul 17 - 06:55 AM
Mrrzy 15 Jul 17 - 10:33 PM
Steve Shaw 03 Jun 17 - 08:04 PM
BobL 03 Jun 17 - 06:49 PM
gillymor 03 Jun 17 - 01:39 PM
Jim Carroll 03 Jun 17 - 01:16 PM
Jim Carroll 03 Jun 17 - 09:06 AM
Joe_F 02 Jun 17 - 08:57 PM
Steve Shaw 02 Jun 17 - 05:43 PM
Steve Shaw 02 Jun 17 - 09:55 AM
Mr Red 23 May 17 - 08:02 AM
Steve Shaw 23 May 17 - 06:33 AM
Donuel 18 May 17 - 09:06 PM
Steve Shaw 18 May 17 - 08:28 PM
Donuel 18 May 17 - 02:02 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 23 Jul 17 - 06:55 AM

My doctor asked me ''Do you smoke after intercourse''~? I had to answer ''I'm sorry but I never looked''


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Jim Carroll
Date: 23 Jul 17 - 03:28 AM

A polceeman walking along the street sees a man with his finger up the backside of another who has his trousers down to his ankles.
"'Ello, 'ello, 'ello - what are you two men doing", he says
"My mate's had too much to drink and I'm trying to make him sick"
"You'll never make him sick like that"
"I will when I put this finger in his mouth" came the reply
Same scenario - this time the unconscious man is lying flat on his back and his mate is blowing into his penis
"What do you think you're doing?"
"He's drunk and he passed out and I'm giving him the 'Kiss of life'.
"Shouldn't that be mouth-to-mouth?
"Have you smelt his breath?"
Jim Carroll


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Mrrzy
Date: 23 Jul 17 - 12:22 AM

I am reminded of the scotswomen who, coming home with their washing, find a drunk passed out in a ditch, his kilt up over his face. One woman looks over and says, At least it's not my husband! Another looks over and says, you're right, he's not your husband! And a third looks over and says, He's not even from our village!


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: michaelr
Date: 22 Jul 17 - 08:19 PM

A couple sits watching a program about Conflicting Emotions.

Guy says, "I think that's nonsense. What could you possibly say to me that would make me feel good and bad at the same time?"

Gal looks at him and says, "Compared with all your friends, you have the biggest dick."


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Donuel
Date: 22 Jul 17 - 12:29 PM

"Proud To Be An American" tune parody

If tomorrow all the billionaires I'd worked for all my life,
Owned all the cash and slaves including my children and my wife.
I'd thank President Trump and Putin, who are here to stay
Where the red white and blue stands for Russia and the USA

And I'm proud to be a Russian asset, cause I know who to obey.
And I won't forget, the votes suppressed that brought us this doomsday.
And I'd gladly stand up next to you and defend Donald today.
'Cause there ain't no doubt I love his land, God bless the rich man's way

From the camps in Vladivostok to nuke plants of Tennessee,
Across the crust of Texas, from seas to shining sea,

From Norlands to the North pole and Moscow to LA,
There's pride in all our oligarchs who we won't betray,
So it's time to stand and salute:

I'm proud to be a Russian Asset cause I know who to obey.
And I won't forget the men who tried and took our rights away.
And I'd gladly stand up next to you and defend Putin today.
'Cause there ain't no doubt I love his land! God bless the rich man's way.

And I'm proud to be a Russian Asset, cause I know who to obey.
And I won't forget the men who tried and took our rights away.
And I'd gladly stand up... next to you and defend her still today.
'Cause there ain't no doubt I love his land God bless the rich man's way.


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Jim Carroll
Date: 22 Jul 17 - 03:26 AM

A Japanese man living in London goes into the doctor complaining of flatulence
The doctor says, "flatulence is not really a serious problem and can probably be cured by something you can getr from your local chemist"
The man says, "this is different", bends over and lets out a loud fart - "Honda"
"That is odd", says the doctor, "drop your trousers and bend over".
He examines the man for a few minutes, pokes around and shines a torch up his backside, and finally says, "you have an abscess".
"What difference does that make" says the man
"Well over here we have an old saying; abscess makes the fart go Honda" came the reply
Jim Carroll


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Donuel
Date: 21 Jul 17 - 07:56 PM

If they ever invent a humorometer what degrees will it display?
(top to bottom)
You die from not being able to take a breath by laughing too hard
Teary eyed uncontrolled laughter
Screaming laugh
huge smiling laugh
lol
smile only
head nod
meh .....................
grimace
shake head no
get up to leave
angry heckle
vomit
Honor killing of the Comic
A Trump reaction to Impeachment


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 21 Jul 17 - 05:50 PM

What do you call Postman Pat when he's on his holidays?






Pat.


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 21 Jul 17 - 03:16 PM

I've just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I'll tell you what, never again.

My friend told me he was going to a fancy dress party as an Italian island. I said to him "Don't be Sicily."


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Donuel
Date: 21 Jul 17 - 03:05 PM

Always good to hear from Saul. Two Sauls with a glass of Goldie is good for heartburn and insomnia.

It is axiomatic in politics that indignation be canned, cards should race, mirrors should smoke, lies should be bald faced, pens be poison, justice obstructed and the ignored vote.

for an instant post I give this a solid meh. Its your jobe to punch up stuff with potential and steal it. Show me Mel Brooks first draft and I'll show you meh plus.


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: saulgoldie
Date: 21 Jul 17 - 12:43 PM

Andrez

Justincase you haven't already discovered this in yer travels...most threads I have ever seen here and elsewhere have a little drift. And not all the posts are always "the best post you ever read" even if it is dead on target. I have found some of the jokes in this year's joke thread funny or not-so-funny, or even "meh." So what? No one died, and no one went to jail.

So my advice, which is usually ignored, despite the great wisdom therein, is to...take a slow breath. Take another one. And another one, still. Real sloooow; real loooong. Andif you find the "funny content" in this thread is too low, then...howabout go listen to or play a song!

Saul


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 21 Jul 17 - 09:27 AM

I say keep the elephant out of the room.


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Andrez
Date: 21 Jul 17 - 08:59 AM

Further to the above, m'lud:

"It is axiomatic in government that hornets' nests should be left unstirred, cans of worms should remain unopened, and cats should be left firmly in bags and not set among the pigeons. Ministers should also leave boats unrocked, nettles ungrasped, refrain from taking bulls by the horns, and resolutely turn their backs to the music."

Wot say you?

Cheers,

Andez


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Donuel
Date: 21 Jul 17 - 06:28 AM

While Investigations continue into the first joke thread, legal council has determined everyone is entitled to a full pardon for a   modest fee.


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Andrez
Date: 21 Jul 17 - 01:06 AM

If people want to go for the jugular please just go buy a copy of any publication from the Murdoch press and enjoy the reading otherwise please just have some fun with words, ideas and jokes in this thread.

No need for special koalafications to do so, they are all irrelephant here, wit and humour are the only prerequisites along with the understanding that you can please some of the people some of the time but you can't ...........

Not too sure where I came across this one but its always been a favourite of mine too in so many ways:

"Due to the high cost of energy the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off".

Cheers,

Andrez


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 20 Jul 17 - 06:57 PM

Poles??

I met a man at the Olympic park who was carrying a long stick.

I asked him, "Are you a pole vaulter?"

"No," he replied, "I'm German. But how did you know my name was Walter?"


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Donuel
Date: 20 Jul 17 - 01:28 PM

Pay back, Retribution and Revenge - is this the premise of your high quality jokes of yesteryear?

For the English to make fun of your Irishmen and Australian is jolly good fun but it does little for Americans.

Don't let your jokes be a guilty pleasure, go for the jugular.
Joke about your Muslim Gays and Poles.


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Andrez
Date: 20 Jul 17 - 09:09 AM

You heard my cri de couer right Steve. Your follow on joke gives a whole new meaning to the word car-go-hydrate.....   So heres a couple o quickies as payback. Sorry if you've heard 'em before ;-)
.......

An Englishman wanted to become an Irishman, so he visited a doctor to find out how to go about this. "Well" said the doctor, "this is a very delicate operation and there is a lot that can go wrong. I will have to remove half your brain". "That's OK" said the Englishman. "I've always wanted to be Irish and I'm prepared to take the risk".

The operation went ahead but the Englishman woke to find a look of horror on the face of the doctor. "I'm so terribly sorry!!" the doctor said. "Instead of removing half the brain, I've taken the whole brain out". The patient replied, "No worries, mate!!"
...............

The seven dwarfs went off to work in the mine one day, while Snow White stayed at home to do the housework and cook their lunch. However when she went to the mine to deliver their lunches, she found there had been a cave-in, and there was no sign of the dwarfs.

Tearfully she yelled in to the mine entrance: "hello - is anyone there. Can anyone hear me".

A voice floated up from the bowels of the mine: " Australia will win the Rugby World Cup"

"Thank god" said Snow White "at least Dopey's still alive"!

Cheers,

Andrez


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 20 Jul 17 - 08:12 AM

Very soon I shall be sojourning in the Andarax valley in Andalucía. Ahhhh!


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Donuel
Date: 20 Jul 17 - 08:12 AM

Take heart Andrez there will be no more pictureless cartoon captions, American pop song jokes, skit humor or 'Which hunt' jokes from my occasional brain farts. The last thing we need is a fist fight on a joke thread although that too is funny. If Steve Shaw doesn't get a joke, or if the laughometer falls below 5 the attempted criminal joke should be expunged. Mods are well practiced at this.

I will get back to reading World History by Donald Trump, who has made America into the biggest joke in the world.

You may have your world of classical kid jokes, dick jokes, wife jokes and fuck jokes for eternity. Its true current events have no longevity.

I assure you, all will be well again my son.
Go in piss.


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Ernest
Date: 20 Jul 17 - 04:15 AM

or - even worse - Andrax....


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: BobL
Date: 20 Jul 17 - 03:31 AM

At least it didn't come out as Andrex...


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 19 Jul 17 - 08:39 PM

Sorry, that was meant to be Andrez! 😳


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 19 Jul 17 - 08:36 PM

I take your post as a cri de couer, Andre. Much of the input to this thread perplexes me in a most unfunny way. By way of retribution, here's an old one, one of Tommy Cooper's best:

My wife rang me last night.

She said, "I think there's water in the carburettor."

I said, "Where's the car?"

She said, "In the river..."


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Andrez
Date: 19 Jul 17 - 07:51 PM

Three months ago I put out a call for actually funny jokes in this thread. Seems like nothing has improved just the same smutty, unfunny meaningless drivel and a great loss to the brilliance of contributions to this joke thread in past years. On current form there doesn't seem like anything to encourage new readers or contributions. Sigh!

Cheers,

Andrez


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Joe_F
Date: 19 Jul 17 - 05:36 PM

A cat is snoozing on a bar, and a couple of Mexicans are boasting about how macho they are. One of them says "My cock is longer than that cat's tail." At length, so to speak, the bartender is persuaded to find a ruler & measure the cat's tail while the customer drops his pants. He then proceeds to the customer, who protests: "Just one moment. Where did you measure the cat's tail *from*?" "From the asshole." "Kindly do me the same favor."


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Donuel
Date: 19 Jul 17 - 11:59 AM

A few of my favorite songs:

I Want a Man with a Small Hand; Wake Me Up in Mar-a-Lago; Tweet, Tweet Tweedle le Tweet Rockin Donald, I'm so Indicted!; Putin on a Blitz; Ain't No Sunshine When I'm Gone; Elderly golf carts, We Warm the World; Secretary of Edukashun; Tronald Dump and Clillary Hinton; Deleter of the Fact; Fired is the Hardest Word; The Brain-Mouth Connection; Trump Acres; Hello, Is It Pee You're Looking For? Miss you niverse. ; Faking stuff is hard to do.


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Donuel
Date: 17 Jul 17 - 02:02 PM

More captions;

Here is our real Bastille prison cell please go in and look around
SLAM

This list is endless, you don't need a hitman you need an Army
I got one, actually I got two.


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Jim Carroll
Date: 17 Jul 17 - 10:02 AM

A group of farmers in a taverna in a small town on the Mexican border were discussing the exploits of the notorious outlaw, 'Pedro the Bandit'
After a while, one of them turned to a stranger sitting quietly in the corner and said, "Have you heard of Pedro the Bandit stranger?"
"Have I heard of Pedro the Bandit, he replied, "only last week I was riding in the mountains when a man clothed head to foot in black jumped out from behind a rock, pointed a gun and said "put up your hands" - I had no gun so what could I do; I put up my hands".
Then he said "hand over all your money" - I had no gun so I handed over my money.
Then he said, "drop your trousers" - what could I do, I dropped my trousers
He said, "shit" - he didn't have to tell me twice, I shit.
"Now", he said, "eat it" - I feared for my life sir so I ate it.
Then for a second the man looked the other way, so I grabbed his gun, pointed it at him and said "put up your hands".
I had a gun, he had none, so he put up his hands
"Hand over all your money", I said - he could not resist - he handed over all his money.
"Now" said, Drop your trousers" he didn't hesitate, he dropped his trousers
Then I told him, "shit" - he was half-way there already - he shat
"Now" I told him "eat it" - you'd think he hadn't eaten for a weak - he ate it all up.
"Have I heard of Pedro the Bandit - didn't I just have lunch with him only last week?"
Jim Carroll


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Donuel
Date: 17 Jul 17 - 09:11 AM

there is nothing more painful than a huge expanding probe.

the taint on Robert Mueller has grown to a full 10 inches.

why we haven't heard from Donald Jr. is a long fake snooze.

It takes a lawyer: "There is nothing wrong with high treason in a broken political system that needs to be drained, suctioned and vetted by Secret Service in perfectly normal oppositional research meetings."


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Donuel
Date: 17 Jul 17 - 07:58 AM

ignore one law ignore them all

Who knew high treason is a big deal?

"I do not recall anything I knew"
- actual quote from witness in Trump Investigation


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 17 Jul 17 - 07:27 AM

Reminds me of one of the oldest of the lot:

"What's you opinion of sex on the television?"

"Bloody uncomfortable, actually..."


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 17 Jul 17 - 06:57 AM

It was one of those days. I saw my wife bent over the freezer with a juicy bit of leg showing above her stockings, when that feeling came and I grabbed her. Made wonderfully passionate love to her from the back........ I am never going to do it again though!!!!!! It wasn't a nice position over the freezer... and besides... we're not allowed back into that supermarket again!!!!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Jim Carroll
Date: 17 Jul 17 - 06:03 AM

A teacher walks into class and finds a turd in the middle of the floor in the front of the class
Horrified, he hurriedly wipes it up and gets on with the lesson
The following two days he finds similar "messages" left on the floor
Then, on the fourth day, when he finds yet another, he says, "I'm going to draw the blinds and turn the lights out when I turn them on again, if the culprit hasn't written an apology on the blackboard I will keep the entire class in for the period of a whole month".
He does so, and when he turns the light on, he sees a steaming turd in the middle of the floor and a message scrawled on the blackboard, "The phantom arsehole strikes again"
Jim Carroll


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Jim Carroll
Date: 16 Jul 17 - 08:32 AM

Did you know that Beethoven was so deaf he thought he was a painter
Jim Carroll


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 16 Jul 17 - 06:55 AM

Young man went to see the doctor.

After a little while the doc said to him, "You're going to have stop masturbating."

"What! Why, doc?!"

"Because I'm trying to examine you..."


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Mrrzy
Date: 15 Jul 17 - 10:33 PM

When do musicians break into song?

Only when they can't find the key!


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 03 Jun 17 - 08:04 PM

I know, gillymor. I know absolutely nothing about Bill Withers and I relayed the joke exactly as it was told to me! 😳


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: BobL
Date: 03 Jun 17 - 06:49 PM

A later version of the stepping-stones story, featuring the three party leaders of the time, ended:
Major: "Tony, shouldn't we have told Paddy about the stepping-stones?"
Blair: "What stepping-stones John?"


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: gillymor
Date: 03 Jun 17 - 01:39 PM

Steve, your Bill Withers joke was pretty good in spite of the high corn factor but I don't think anyone over here thinks of him as a country singer. R&B or Soul singer maybe but he was kind of hard to categorize.


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Jim Carroll
Date: 03 Jun 17 - 01:16 PM

A young lad is on a cruise with his parents when the ship runs into a mighty storm and goes down
He clings to a piece of wreckage and eventually finds himself washed ashore on an idyllic island - the sole survivor.
He finds there is plenty of fruit to be had and a ready supply of spring water, fo me manages to build himself a shelter of sorts and take care of himself.
No-one comes to rescue him and he is there for years, growing into a fit and healthy young man
As he matures, he begins to be aware of his body, particularly his penis, which has him completely puzzled because of all it's apparently uncontrollable idiosyncrasies
He begins to explore all its possibilities and finds that as he sits on the shore and allows it to dangle down, if he tenses his muscles he can flick the pebbles with it.
He practices and practices - first a few inches, then a foot, then two foot, then a yard.... until he discovers he can sit a fair distance and flick them into the sea.
One day he is totally engrossed in his game when he looks up to find a beautiful, scantily-clad young woman, another survivor of another shipwreck watching him curiously.
"What are you doing?" she asks.
He explains at length (so to speak) telling her how he has increased his ability over the years.
"That's an awful waste", she says, let me show you what to do with it - and she throws of what clothes she had on, sits down beside him and begins to work on him until they both fall onto the sand and make passionate love.
"There", she gasps, "when they've finished, "what do you think about that?"
"Very interesting", he replies, "but I suppose you know you've totally ruined my flicker".
Jim Carroll


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Jim Carroll
Date: 03 Jun 17 - 09:06 AM

In the run up to WW2, the Pope and Stalin held a secret meeting on Lake Galilee to discuss the threat of fascism looming over the world
They sat with their representatives in a small boat in the middle of the lake and debated furiously until the Pope decided he wanted a pee, so he climbed out of the boat, walked across the surface of the lake and relieved himself under the nearest tree.
Determined not to be outdone, shortly afterwards Stalin followed suit, clambered over the side of the boat and sank like a stone and was quickly hauled to safety.
A couple of hours later the Pope was taken short again and repeats his performance - shortly after, Stalin, tries to emulate his performance and has to be hauled out again.
The third time this happened the Pope says, "for ***** sake, show him where the stepping stones are before he drowns himself"
Jim Carroll


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Joe_F
Date: 02 Jun 17 - 08:57 PM

A Jew was sitting on a bus, and he noticed that the black man next to him was reading a Yiddish newspaper. Eventually he could not contain his curiosity, and he said, "Excuse me, sir, I know it's none of my business, but are you actually Jewish?"

"This I need too?"


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 02 Jun 17 - 05:43 PM

Q. How do you turn a duck into a country singer?

A. Put it in the microwave until its bill withers.




I'll get me coat...


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 02 Jun 17 - 09:55 AM

Not a joke exactly, but in keeping with the spirit. Handed over my loyalty card at Morrisons this morning and the checkout machine churned out a voucher for a "free regular hot drink* from your Café."


*not valid online


'Ave a word, Dave!


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Mr Red
Date: 23 May 17 - 08:02 AM

Man goes to get his hair done and the barber asks how he wants it cut.
"In silence" cam the reply.

reputedly said by Enoch Powell (controversial UK politician of the 60s-80s)

also documented as a Roman joke.


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 23 May 17 - 06:33 AM

I've just been reading about crime in multi-storey car parks. It seems wrong on so many different levels.


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Donuel
Date: 18 May 17 - 09:06 PM

(Trump under oath)
Mueller: President Trump, was there collusion with Russia?

Donald: There was no co-illusion

Mueller: what was that?

There was no conclusion
:again please
There was no coal fusion
:could you speak into the mike?
There was no coal lit Shaun
:Please, was there collusion yes or no?
There was no collision
:I will ask you one last time!
There was um, confusion with Russia


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 18 May 17 - 08:28 PM

Shamelessly nicked from today's Guardian, and Lenny Bruce for that matter.

The Lone Ranger and his faithful sidekick Tonto are surrounded by Injuns and facing certain death.

The Lone Ranger says, "This time, old friend, it looks like we're finished."

Tonto replies, "What's with the 'we,' white man?"


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Subject: RE: BS: First Joke Thread of 2017
From: Donuel
Date: 18 May 17 - 02:02 PM

Reporter: What?

Spicer: Second base


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Mudcat time: 23 July 2:39 PM EDT

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