Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him

Subject: Looking for a Song
From:
Date: 27 Nov 00 - 11:55 AM

I was wondering if anyone knows of a song with the following lyrics:

" 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
10 9 8 4 6 5 4 3 2 1

To market, to market with my brother jim
Somebody threw a tomato at him
Tomatoes are soft & they don't bruise the skin
But this one killed Jim; it was wrapped in a tin!

Chorus- Get away, get away
It's a mighty fine song & I'll sing it all day.

(repeat counting)

Mary the Milk Maid was milking her cow
The trouble with Mary, she didn't know how
The farmer came by & gave Mary the sack
So she flipped the cow over & poured the milk back!

(repeat chorus & counting)"

I know there's at least one more verse, maybe two. If anyone know the rest of the words and/or the title of the song, I'd appreciate the help. Thanks.

Craig

---

Line breaks added. --JoeClone

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Looking for a Song
From: Noreen
Date: 27 Nov 00 - 01:10 PM

Don't know it myself, but somebody here will...

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Looking for a Song
From: GUEST,Kernow Jon
Date: 27 Nov 00 - 01:34 PM

I heard a version of Spanish Lady the other day with the chorus:
18, 16, 14, 12, 10
8, 6, 4, 2, none,
19, 17, 15, 13, 11,
9, 7, 5, 3, and 1
It were a bu**er to sing!
But I don't suppose that helps your quest.
KJ

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Looking for a Song
From: Noreen
Date: 27 Nov 00 - 02:09 PM

LOL!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Looking for a Song
From: Snuffy
Date: 27 Nov 00 - 07:12 PM

One of our morris side sings it to the tune of Villikins and his Dinah (Sweet Betsy from Pike to our transatlantic cousins) and the chorus is:

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

The first verse is similar to yours, and the second goes:

Down on the farm I was milking a cow
But how to milk it I didn't know how
I pulled its tail instead of its tit
And all that I got was a bucket of
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 etc

Those are the only two verses he does, and if it has a title I suppose it would be "10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1"

Wassail! V

Subject: Lyr Add: SOMEBODY THREW A TOMATO AT HIM
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 31 Jul 02 - 10:36 PM

I used Google to search for "Somebody threw a tomato at him" and found several versions of the song. The title varies; sometimes it's "Brother Jim", "Uncle Jim", "1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10", or "To Market, To Market." Sometimes the verses appeared as part of "Wild Rover" or a parody of same, and appeared with other parody verses, some of them obscene. Some clean versions were called "scouting songs."

I didn't find any American versions; they would have to say "can" instead of "tin."

Additional verses found at http://members.iinet.net.au/~oneilg/scouts/songs/tomarket.html:

I called on my girlfriend. Her name was Miss Brown,
She was having a bath and she couldn't come down,
I said, "Slip on something, you'd better be quick."
She slipped on the soap, and by gad she was quick [or "was down in a tick"].

I looked out my window too early one morn,
And there was a tramp, he was chompin' the lawn.
I said, "My young man, if you feel like a snack,
The grass is much longer around at the back."

With different chorus, the song was called "Get Away" at http://www.djmorton.demon.co.uk/scouting/songs/getaway.htm:

Get away, get away,
It's a mighty fine song so I'll sing it all day,
With a 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,
10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1,
And a 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,
It's a mighty fine song so I'll sing it again.

More verses AND a different chorus found at http://www.thepelicans.co.uk/history7.htm:

Oh, Jemima, just look at your Uncle Jim,
All there in the duck pond a-learnin' to swim
He first tries the backstroke, he then tries the side
But he's now underwater, aswim 'gainst the tide.
CHO: Tooraloo, tooralee, O how would you, how would you like to be me?

Oh, the oul' barn door was the table we had
And the table we had was the oul' barn door
And the oul' barn door was the table we had
Yes the table we had was the oul' barn door,
CHO: Tooraloo, Tooralee...

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Looking for a Song
From: Snuffy
Date: 01 Aug 02 - 09:09 AM

Jim, I remember a different tune for Oh, Jemima (it was a bit like Oh Mr Porter crossed with Gounod's Soldiers' Chorus). I think there's been a thread about Oh Jemima.

WassaiL! V

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Dave Bryant
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 07:30 AM

This and the other verses above are all just "floaters" fo a variety of comic songs sung to the tune of "Villikins and his Dinah". I use a couple of them for "The Thrashing Machine".

My version of one of Jim's verses is rather more explicit:

I called on my girlfriend - her name is Miss Brown.
She was having a bath and she couldn't come down.
I said, "Slip on something", she called "Half a tick."
Then she slipped on the soap, and slid down on my .....
(I usually play the guitar break a bit early and just mouth the word)

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST,Brien
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 10:30 PM

I heard someone sing this:

I went to the market with my brother Tim
When somebody lobbed a tomato at him
Now, to throw a tomato is not such a sin
But this little bugger was still in the tin

The chorous went:

I did her, I did her, I did her, I did
I did her, I did her, I did her, I did
I did her, I did her, I did her, I did
I did her, I did her, I did her, I did

Brien

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Roughyed
Date: 03 Aug 02 - 03:11 AM

I think Fivepeny Piece recorded a version. I can remember a couple of verses.

As I was a-walking down Stamford Street
I saw a poor bloke with no shoes to his feet
Now I having plenty of brass for to spare
I nipped into a fruit shop and I bought him a pair.

My cousin Jim one day for a stunt
Went out one day with his coat back to front
A bloody big bus come and knocked our Jim down
He would have been saved but they turned his head round

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Aug 02 - 07:35 AM

Sing high sing low where ever we go
The boys of the Royal Navy never say no
There's C/Os and P/Os and CPOs too
They stand on the F'ocsle with fuck all to do
For all they're worth they might as well be
shovelling up shit on the isle of Capri

Theres MPs and GIs so tall and so slim
till somebody threw a tomato at them
Now tomatoes dont hurt when they come in the skin
but this fucker did cause it came in a tin

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Chris/Darwin
Date: 03 Aug 02 - 08:06 AM

Isn't it amazing what the folk process does. I learned this one from someone in Port Moresby about 30 years ago. I have made up verses to suit particular gigs.

The original:

To market, to market, went my Uncle Jim
When somebody threw a tomato at him
Tomatoes are soft, and don't bruise the skin
But this one it did, it was wrapped in a tin

I went to my girl friends, her name is Miss Brown
She was having a bath, and couldn't come down
I said "Slip on something, be down in a tic"
So she slipped on some soap, and my God she was quick!

I dreamed I did die, and to heaven did go
"Where do you come from" they wanted to know
When I told them from Moresby (substitute the name you want) they said "come right in"
"You're the first one we've had from that cesspool of sin"

Chorus:
Singing toora li oora li oora li a
Singing toora li oora li oora li a
Repeat last two verses

Regards
Chris

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Chris/Darwin
Date: 03 Aug 02 - 09:01 AM

I meant, of course, last two lines...

Regards
Chris

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST
Date: 24 Sep 06 - 08:03 AM

A Version found in an old school-book:

I went to the market with my brother Jim
When someone throw a tomato at him
Now, tomatos don`t hurt, when they come in their skin
but this one hurt, it came in a tin.

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST
Date: 24 Sep 06 - 11:32 AM

Get Away
To market, to market went my uncle Jim,
When somebody threw a tomato at him,
Now tomatoes are soft and they don't hurt the skin,
But this one it did 'cos it was in a tin!

The chorus:
Get away, get away,
It's a mighty fine song so I'll sing it all day,
With a 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,
10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1,
And a 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,
It's a mighty fine song so I'll sing it again.

Now Mary the milkmaid was milking a cow,
But poor little Mary she didn't know how,
She went and she tried, but she pulled the wrong mit,
And all of a sudden was covered in ****!

Chorus

I called on my girlfriend, her name is Miss Brown,
She was having a bath so she couldn't come down,
I said 'slip on something, be down in tick',
She slipped on the soap and, by God she was quick!

Chorus

from

www.djmorton.demon.co.uk/scouting/songs/getaway.htm

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at
From: GUEST,SallyP
Date: 24 Sep 06 - 12:13 PM

This is an old 'traditional' Scout song, sung (yes) to the tune of 'Villikins & his Dinah'

As i was out walking with my Uncle Jim,
Somebody threw a tomato at him.
"Tomatoes don't hurt you", he said with a grin
"Only that one was 'specially wrapped in a tin".

The song 1 2 3 4.....4 3 2 1 etc. encompasses the above verse very nicely, and there are DOZENS more 'floating' humorous verses that also fit very well.   e.g.

"Jonah the Prophet was caught by a Whale
By whome he was swallowed or so goes the tale.
But then after three days and nights Jonah found
The truth that "You can't keep a good fellow down".

and F A R too many more !!

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Mo the caller
Date: 24 Sep 06 - 01:44 PM

Was it the Yetis who sang a version of the verse that was in the first post
"Mary the Milk Maid was milking her cow
The trouble with Mary, she didn't know how
The farmer came by & gave Mary the sack
So she flipped the cow over & poured the milk back!"

As I remember their verse ended
The old cow turned round and it said with a frown
You hang on tight love, I'll jump up and down.

And to the same tune The Muck Spreader song (I can only remember the chorus)
Fling it here, fling it there,
If you're in the way you will all get your share.

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Snuffy
Date: 24 Sep 06 - 03:57 PM

The Yetties do that verse in Dorset is Beautiful

Now Sarah went milking with Nellie the cow
She pulled and she tugged, but she didn't quite know how
So after a short while, Nellie turned with a frown
Said "You hang on tight love, I'll jump up and down."

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 24 Sep 06 - 06:43 PM

Snuffy

Is that before or after the verse saying "Farmer Brown looked at Gwendolyn and he looked at young Ned"?

Kitty

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Compton
Date: 24 Sep 06 - 07:33 PM

I'll put a vote in for "The Thrashing Machine"...it's where I heard that verse!

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Snuffy
Date: 24 Sep 06 - 07:42 PM

Kitty, I know the verse you mean, but it's missing from the (old) recording I have: perhaps they had to do a sanitised version for the BBC!

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at
From: GUEST
Date: 24 Sep 06 - 08:13 PM

I seem to remember Mike Harding singing this one

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Scrump
Date: 25 Sep 06 - 04:27 AM

There must be an infinite number of versions of this song. One that springs to mind is by Fivepenny Piece on their live album "On Stage". On that the song was called 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10. Sung as others have said to the tune of Villikins and his Dinah. Many of the verses mentioned above are in their version.

(Not sure if that's the version the above GUEST was thinking of? I think Mike Harding may have sung it with the band on one of their joint TV shows in the 1970s, on BBC TV)

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Scrump
Date: 25 Sep 06 - 08:01 AM

Re. the Threshing Machine (or Thrashing Machine as it's sometimes called) - some versions have a slightly different chorus from the one mentioned above:

I 'ad 'er, I 'ad 'er, I 'ad 'er, I ay
I 'ad 'er, I 'ad 'er, I 'ad 'er, I ay
I 'ad 'er, I 'ad 'er, I 'ad 'er, I ay
An' I upped an' I showed 'er the way

(Fred Wedlock sang that on his version; whereas Adge Cutler didn't, at least, not on his live recording of the song.)

I would guess that Peter Sellers must have heard this version as he sang a chorus very similar to the above in his "Suddenly It's Folk Song" spoof of the folk revival, recorded in the laste 1950s.

I think the Threshing Machine/Thrashing Machine usually tells a slightly bawdy tale about a bloke showing a girl his threshing machine and the consequences of this (ooerr missus!); whereas 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10 or variations thereof are just a rag-bag of (usually slightly rude) funny verses thrown together for laughs.

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST,HughM
Date: 25 Sep 06 - 08:09 AM

If I remember rightly it's on Mike Harding's L.P. "A Lancashire Lad". The chorus goes "toora loo, toora lay, the best of society lives down our way".

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Snuffy
Date: 25 Sep 06 - 09:03 AM

I 'ad 'er, I 'ad 'er, I 'ad 'er away
And I led that virginal creature astray.

Adge Cutler's Threshing Machine has completely different verses to the Rugby Club version I learned. Perhaps he wrote/adapted it himself.

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST,Dr Price
Date: 25 Sep 06 - 09:24 AM

When I was but a lad in the Valley Folk Club, Pontardawe, I heard Jim Harper (of Neath, fabulous singer) singing:

I went up to Cardiff to call on Miss Brown,
She was up in the bath and she wouldn't come down.
Says I: "Slip on something, and be very quick,"
So she slipped on some soap – she was down in a tick

CHORUS: Tooraloo, tooralay,
                The cream of society lives down our way.

To market, to market to buy me a hen,
For I thought as I might like some eggs now and then;
But when I got home I had a hell of a shock,
Said the hen: "I can't lay eggs because I'm a cock".

I was a-walking down our main street
I saw a man with no shoes on his feet
I took pity on him, and right and there
Went into a fruit shop and brought him a pear.

I was a-walking with our brother Jim,
Somebody threw a tomato at him.
That may be all right when they're still in their skin,
But this bugger wasn't - it was inside a tin.

I went and died and to heaven did go,
Where did I come from, they wanted to know.
"I comes from South Wales" – oh, how they did stare,
They said: "Come right inside – you're the first one from there."

CHORUS: Tooraloo, tooralay,
                The cream of society lives down our way.

Subject: RE: Looking for a Song: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Scrump
Date: 25 Sep 06 - 11:36 AM

Adge Cutler's Threshing Machine has completely different verses to the Rugby Club version I learned. Perhaps he wrote/adapted it himself

I think Adge was forced by EMI to keep it clean in those days. It was originally issued on a single and would probably have been played in jukeboxes in pubs, etc., so would have to be cleaner than the rubgy version (assuming the version you know is as filthy as the rest!)

Subject: Lyr Add: Threshing Machine
From: Snuffy
Date: 25 Sep 06 - 07:35 PM

They are different enough to count as two different songs: same basic theme and same tune, but completely different words and emphasis.

Threshing Machine (RUGBY VERSION)

I worked for a farmer, you know him quite well,
And he had a daughter, her name were Sweet Nell
And though she were only the age of 16
I showed her the works of my thrashing machine

I 'ad 'er, I 'ad 'er, I 'ad 'er away
I 'ad 'er, I 'ad 'er, I 'ad 'er away
I 'ad 'er, I 'ad 'er, I 'ad 'er away
And I led that virginal creature astray.

We went to a barn where it was quite dry
Some hay in the corner we there did espy
She worked the throttle and I worked the steam
When I showed her the works of my thrashing machine

Six months have passed and all is not well
There's something the matter with our little Nell
For under her apron can plainly be seen
The works of my naughty old thrashing machine

A year has gone by and all is now well
A son has been born to our little Nell
And under his nappy can plainly be seen
A brand-new 2-cylinder thrashing machine

My Threshing Machine (ADGE CUTLER)

Now I farmed in Carlsbury when I were a boy
A courting of Rose, she were my pride and joy
Now Rosie was pretty and just 17
When I showed her the works of my threshing machine
Threshing machine, threshing machine,
I showed her the works of my threshing machine

She told me that she were a much-travelled girl
Seen faces, been places all over the world
But there was one sight that her eyes never seen
A vertical piston-drive threshing machine
Threshing machine, threshing machine,
A vertical piston-drive threshing machine

We went to the barn and I took her inside
And said "If you're good I might give 'ee a ride"
It stood there all sparkling and shiny and clean
She said "That's what I call a threshing machine"
Threshing machine, threshing machine,
"That's what I call a threshing machine"

She asked me to demonstrate how the thing worked
So I let out the clutch: the machine went berserk
You couldn't see nought for the smoke and the steam
When I started revving my threshing machine
Threshing machine, threshing machine,
When I started revving my threshing machine

When I said Rose could drive it, for better or worse,
The whole damned contraption went into reverse
The camshaft seized up - well, you know what I mean
And that was the end of my threshing machine
Threshing machine, threshing machine,
Now that was the end of my threshing machine

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST,Bry
Date: 06 Jan 08 - 03:44 AM

When I was a kid, this was the verse that I knew

I went to the circus with my uncle Jim
Somebody threw a tomato at him
Tomatos are usually soft to the skin
But this one half killed him,
and it came in a tin

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Harmonium Hero
Date: 12 Jan 08 - 06:10 PM

I remember my parents singing bits of this song, back in the '50s. My recollections are a bit sketchy, but it wasn't the same as the Mike Harding version.
It had refrain lines, thus:
I called on my sweetheart, her name was miss brown
With a heigh, ho, come to the fair.
She was having a bath, and she couldn't come down
With a heigh, ho, come to the fair.
I said "slip on something and come down a tick";
She slipped on the soap and came down pretty quick
With a heigh, ho, (la la la la la la la la la la) in the morning.
Sorry, but that line escapes me; the first four las might have been 'come to the fair' again, but the others are lost in the mists of time J.K.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 12 Jan 08 - 06:17 PM

See Delivering the Morning Milk on this page.
I have also heard those lyrics somewhere else but can't remember where!
Giok

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: LeTenebreux
Date: 13 Jan 08 - 09:52 AM

These lyrics fit in "So Long It's Been Good to Know Yuh". Is this a coincidence?

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST,Suffolk Miracle
Date: 14 Jan 08 - 09:55 AM

I went to my girlfriend and this I did say:
'What would you like since today's your birthday?'
She said 'I'd like diamonds' - so right there and then
I gave her the ace jack queen king nine and ten.

I went for a trip on the old underground
But I slipped on the step and I fell to the ground.
The vicar rushed up -'Did you miss a step, son?'
I said 'No you daft *******, I hit every one'

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST,Andy
Date: 14 Jan 08 - 04:25 PM

I remember The Fivepenny Piece doing a version of this Titled 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10. I have heard many versions since from a variety of people, most of the verses I rcall have been have been written above.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: LeTenebreux
Date: 15 Jan 08 - 05:34 PM

Not to go off on a tangent, but perhaps a second order Taylor polynomial, at least one version "So Long It's Been Good to Know You" has the following lines:

I went down to the barn, as has been my rule;
Went down to milk, had a pail and a stool.
The cow tossed her head and she swished 'round her tail
And planted her left hind foot smack in the pail.
I said, "Listen here, Bossy, stop pawin' the ground.
I had a hard night, I was slippin' around."
She looked at me with her eyes big and brown
And said "You just hang on, boy, I'll jump up and down.

This looks eerily similar. The verses have the same meter as "Somebody Threw A Tomato At Him" even if the tune isn't quite the same (I found a Johnny Cash recording of "Sweet Betsy from Pike".

I'm inclined to think that there's some sort of connection between these songs, even if it's just that other people besides me have felt compelled to mix and match verses.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST,Hannah DC
Date: 22 Jan 08 - 02:27 PM

The 3 verses I grew up with were:

"To market, to market went my cousin Jim,
When somebody threw a tomato at him,
Tomatoes are soft and they don't break the skin,
But this one killed Jim - it was wrapped in a tin!"

"Mary the milkmaid was milking a cow,
The trouble with Mary she didn't know how!
The farmer came round and he gave her the sack,
So she tipped the cow over and poured the milk back!"

"Roger was taking his time in the shower,
Sue called from downstairs - 'You've been in for an hour!'
Roger called back - 'I'll be down in a tick!'
But he slipped on the soap and by Gee! He was quick!"

With a chorus of only

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

To the same tune as the verse.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST,Joyce
Date: 27 Jul 08 - 04:56 PM

I went down to the market to by a fat hen
an egg for me breakfast I'd have now and then
but when I got home, ew I had such a shock
the hen that I bought turned out to be a cock.
singing 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10......

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST,kjmaybury
Date: 10 Oct 08 - 04:48 AM

This is what my dad used to sing to me when I was younger

Two big black eyes has my brother jim
cuz somebody threw some tomatoes at him
Tomatoes don't hurt said poor jim with a grin
But those darn tomatoes
They were in a tin

The salvation army once called at our door
said they were saving mens soles by the score
I said what about your woman
they said they are alright
I said Save me a big fat one for next saturday night

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: clueless don
Date: 10 Oct 08 - 08:34 AM

In the sixties a local radio station (WHFS, in the Washington DC area) played a number of "hip recitations" or "beat recitations". I don't remember the name of the performer, or when the recordings were made (though I got the impression that it was before the sixties.)

One of them tells the story of Galileo taking "two unequally weighted balls of dough" and dropping them from a tower [presumably in reference to the famous demonstration that items of different weight fall at the same speed.] An observer says something like "Big deal - two dough balls" and "threw a tomato at the doctor" ("the doctor" being Galileo.) The recitation goes on - I don't remember anymore of the words until the very end - and at some point I think some cheese gets involved, so that finally they decide to call the tower "The Leaning Tower of Pizza".

There was another recitation, by the same performer I believe, about Albert Einstein. I would love to know more about these recitations!

Don

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST,Pete
Date: 11 Oct 08 - 05:15 AM

Mary the milkmaid was milking the cow,
and poor little Mary she didn't know how.
With only one udder to take hold and pull
Mary the milkmaid was milking the bull!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST,mayomick
Date: 11 Oct 08 - 04:58 PM

Cockneys I used to know used to sing for the chorus :

hold yer row ,hear what i say
and we kill every copper that gets down our way

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Oct 08 - 06:19 PM

My dad used to sing a version of this that he learned from his dad. We used to sing it in the car when I was small. Same tune as Sweet Betsy From Pike. We knew it as Are You Mister Reilly?

Are You Mister Reilly that owns this hotel,
Are you Mister Reilly they speak of so well,
"Cause of you're Mister Reilly, then blimey o'reilly
If you're Mister Reilly you ain't half looking well

(Chorus) Hold your row, hold your row
What d'you say, what d'you say
For the queen of society lives down our way
For the queen of society lives down our way

I called on my sweetheart, her name was Miss Brown,
She was having a bath and she couldn't come down,
She said she'd slip on something and be down in a tick,
She slipped on the soap and she did come down quick

(Chorus)

One day I met a poor boy in the street
He was ever so hungry, no shoes to his feet
So as I had money and plenty to spare
I went to the fruiterer's and bought him a pair

(Chorus)

There was a young man and his name was Lord Jim
He complained that his wife threw tomatoes at him
Now tomatoes are soft and don't injure the skin
But this one it did, it was inside a tin

(chorus)

One day I died and to Heaven did go
And where did I come from, they wanted to know,
When I told them from *(insert birthplace here, in my dad's case it was Catford so that's how I learnt it)* it made them all stare
Come in, said St Peter, you're the first one from there

(Chorus)

The way I learnt it, it was a one of those sort of trad cockney songs, music hall I suppose, like My Old Man's A Dustman and Your Baby Has Gone Down The Plughole and Knocked 'Em In The Old Kent Road, that kind of thing.

Gosh, that's brought back memories.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Bill S from Melbourne
Date: 11 Oct 08 - 06:36 PM

Kitty
from memory
Farmer looked at Young Gwendoline and he looked at Young Ned
What an andsome young couple they ought to be wed
But farmer sighed softly, its impossible of course
Cos Gwendoline's my daughter and Ned is my orse.

As I said on another thread, it is a pity we didn't collect all the verses the locals gave us in the Smiths Arms in 75.

On Song for Every Season there is a song
All young men who go a courtin, mind which way you choose a wife
If you marry my wife's daughter, you'll be a beggar for the rest of your life
20 18 16 14 12 10 8 6 4 2 none 19 17 15 13 11 9 7 5 3 and 1

Wassail
Bill S once from Perth now Melbourne

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST
Date: 10 Mar 09 - 01:08 AM

Truly sorry for intruding, but would you know where I can find the song "Oh Jemima (look at your Uncle Jim)?

It is my old gran's fave, but I can't find it anywhere - not even on Amazon.

Could you please email me if you happen to know where I can find it?

Thank you!!!

[e-mail]

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 11 Mar 09 - 10:10 AM

Mark Fernandez: See the thread Lyr Add: Oh Jemima

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST,beefcake
Date: 07 Jun 09 - 12:27 AM

this part of a colin buchanan song. he is an australian singer and his songs are great. this song is from one of his kids cds but i cant remember which one

Subject: 2nd verse of "Knocked 'em in The Old Kent Road"
From: GUEST,Xrias
Date: 20 Aug 09 - 12:24 PM

It starts "Your Uncle Bill in Clerkenwell"

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST,Dave Webb.
Date: 24 Sep 09 - 11:59 AM

Dorset is Beautiful.
To market to market to market with Jim
When somebody threw a tomato at him
Tomatoes are soft when they're still in the skin
But this bugger weren't it was still in the tin.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Tug the Cox
Date: 25 Sep 09 - 06:49 AM

I learned the 'Mr Reilly' versionas a kid in London, different third line though

Are you Mister Reilly who owns the Hotel?
Are you Mister Reilly they speak of so well?
Well if you're Mister Reilly they speak of so highly
Well blimey O'Reilly you are looking well.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST,Fantum
Date: 25 Sep 09 - 07:29 AM

Gathered of Mudcat over the years

As I was a 'walking one morning with a lass,
Two Guisbro farmers I chanced for to pass.
And one said to the other as we went strolling by;
"There be more birds in the long grass than there be in the sky"

Oh! Nellie is my girlfriend and I loves her so.
She's as big as an haystack and 40 years old.
Farmer says hers ginormous and loud do he scoff
For you has to leave a chalk mark to show where you left off.

Farmer looks at young Gwendoline and he looks at young Ned
"What a handsome young couple, they ought to be wed".
Farmer says sadly "It's impossible of course
For Gwendoline is my daughter and Ned he is my horse".

One day as her went milking with Nellie the cow,
Her pulled and her tugged but her didn't know how.
So after a short while, Nellie turned with a frown,
Saying "You hang on tight love and I'll jump up and down".

There's a public convenience along North Gate street
And some silly beggar went and painted the seat
Now bottoms are plentiful, and the all look the same
But my arse is different, for it comes in a frame

As I was a-walking down Allison Street
I saw a poor bloke with no shoes to his feet
Now I having plenty of brass for to spare
I nipped into a fruit shop and I bought him a pair.

My cousin Jim one day for a stunt
Went out one day with his coat back to front
A bloody big bus come and knocked our Jim down
He would have been saved but they turned his head round

Now Mary, the milkmaid, was milking the cow.
She was trying so hard but she didn't know how.
Along came the farmer and gave her the sack,
So she turned the cow over and poured the milk back!

I dreamt that I died, and to heaven did go
But "Where do you come from" they wanted to know
When I said from Guisbro they said "Come right in,
You're the first one we've had from that cess pool of sin"

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST
Date: 22 Jan 10 - 09:29 AM

Just thought I'd throw this wording in as its the one I remember from childhood:

(Chorus)
1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10.
10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1.
1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10.
10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1.

Mary the milkmaid was milking a cow,
The trouble with Mary, she didn't know how,
Out came the farmer and gave her the sack,
So she tipped the cow over and poured the milk back.

(chorus)

To market, to market with my brother Jim,
When someone threw a tomato at him,
Tomatoes are soft but this one killed him,
For this tomato was wrapped in a tin.

(chorus)

I called on my girlfriend, her name is Miss Brown,
She was having a shower and couldn't come down,
I said, "Slip on something, you'd better be quick."
So she slipped on the soap, and by god she was slick.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST,Maria Peck
Date: 10 May 10 - 03:38 PM

these are the lyrics that my dad used to sing

"I went to market with my brother Jim
Somebody threw a tomato at him,
A tomato's alright when it wrapped in its skin
But this blooming tomato was wrapped in a tin"

and the other verse
"I was a courting a young girl named Brown
She was a bathing when l called around
I said slip on something, come down for a trip
And she slipped on the soap and she did come down quick"

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 May 10 - 04:16 PM

There's not much use throwing tomatoes at anyone anymore if you live in North America. The corporate Agri-businesses here have genetically modified all the damn tomatoes so that they are about as hard as tennis balls (and they don't taste much better either).

They did this over a period of years with an eye toward protecting the tomatoes from rough handling by harvesting machines and in shipment, and to keep them from getting bruises so they will look nice and pristine at your grocery. They now have thick, tough skins and very little flavour at all. What flavour they have is mostly sour.

Tomatoes used to be delicious, and they were picked mostly by Mexican workers who were treated like slaves and paid starvation wages. This guaranteed big profits for the growers. The Mexicans and other migrant workers organized and fought for decent wages and working conditions....and finally got some of that after decades of struggle.

The growers were not pleased. Since they now had to pay a half-decent wage to the pickers, they decided they might be better off with no pickers at all, and they hired people to find a solution. The solution was to replace the pickers with automated harvesting machines, but the machines turned out to be too rough and the tomatoes were getting damaged a lot by them. This caused loss of stock and hurt profits.

The Agri-business people hired more scientists and specialists to figure out how to make the tomatoes more durable. Their efforts culminated in an "improved" tomato that is picked green, ripened in a room by immersion in a toxic gas that will kill you if you stay in that room very long, and shipped by the billions to all the chain stores in North America. It is, like I said, almost as tough as a tennis ball, looks nice and bright red and flawless after it's been artificially "ripened" off the vine, and tastes like a wretchedly pale shadow of the delicious tomatoes people used to grow on 100,000 small independent farms all over the place.

The small, independent farms are virtually all gone now, because they can't afford the hugely expensive harvesting machines and can't compete with the Big Boys.

And we all get to eat lousy, hard, not very good tasting tomatoes that are very much lacking in the vitamins and minerals that natural tomatoes once had...so you could say that you're eating denatured celluloid that looks like a tomato.

This is the triumph of modern mass marketing! Oh yeah...and about 50,000 migrant workers lost their jobs to the harvesting machines...all because they wanted to be paid a living wage and not treated like animals.

If you want to throw a tomato at someone, throw it at the CEO of the corporation that ships tomatoes to your local supermarket. And use an Italian-grown garden tomato from Italy...a REAL tomato that will be soft and thin skinned like a tomato should be. It'll make a real mess out of his $3000 suit.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Paul Reade
Date: 10 May 10 - 04:34 PM

One verse (I think Mike Harding may have sung it) that no-one seems to have mentioned:-

"One day me granny, she made a rice pud
And when she had finished, by gum it were good
But she made it in't kettle, and we couldn't get t' bugger out
So we had to take turns sucking it out through the spout"

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: banjoman
Date: 11 May 10 - 05:47 AM

My Auntie Bertha in Hospital lay
The doctor who saw her was heard to say
This womans a miracle this womans a dream
Cos we've found drops of blood in her alcohol stream

The only verse I can add to all those who have already contributed.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: Rob Naylor
Date: 11 May 10 - 06:31 AM

This song, with innumerable verses, changing according to location about the country, is one I remember as being one that we always sang on Boy Scout trips.

The "heaven and hell" verses changed according to the domicile of the Scout troop doign the singing, and every troop seemed to have its own "pet" verses relating to incidents peculiar to that troop.

The only constant thing was the "tomato in a tin" verse, AND
the chorus:

Too-ra-lye-oo-ra-lye-oo-ra-lye-ay
The chorus is good I could sing it all day
Too-ra-lye-oo-ra-lye-oo-ra-lye-ay
And now we will have the next verse

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST,James
Date: 11 May 10 - 08:20 PM

Like Rob above, I also used to sing this song on Scout camping trips, usually around the camp fire, now about 25 years ago.

The only verses I remember are these which are kind of covered above but I thought I'd add them as they have slightly different wording:

-------
I went a-walking with my brother, Jim
Somebody threw a tomato at him
Now, tomatoes are soft and they don't break the skin
But this blighter did, it was still in the tin

To market, to market to buy me a cow
To milk it, to milk it, I did not know how
I pulled on the tail instead of the tit
And instead of milk, I was covered in sh...
-------

I also remember singing the verse a couple of people list above about someone going out with their coat on backwards, getting hit by a bus and would have survived were it not for having their head turned round. There were other verses that we sang but I don't remember them at all, even seeing all the variations above.

It's a very silly song but I have really fond memories of singing it... :-)

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST
Date: 12 May 10 - 02:15 AM

Chorus
1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,
10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1,
1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,
10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1

To market, to market with my brother Jim,
When somebody threw a tomato at him,
Tomatoes are soft and they don't bruise the skin,
But this one killed Jim it was wrapped in a tin!

Chorus

Now Mary the milkmaid was milking a cow,
The trouble with Mary she didn't know how,
Along came the farmer, and gave her the sack,
So she turned the cow over and poured the milk back!
Chorus

(Alternative ending to Mary
She went and she tried, but she pulled the wrong tit,
And all of a sudden was covered in ****!)

Chorus

I called on my girlfriend, her name was Miss Brown,
She was having a bath so she couldn't come down,
I said 'slip on something, and you'd better be quick',
So she slipped on the soap and, by Gosh she was quick!

Chorus

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Somebody threw a tomato at him
From: GUEST,GUEST
Date: 25 Jun 10 - 10:07 PM

I remember one of these from childhood...

Old Father Brown's hair was all falling out
So he went to the barber and started to shout:
"Oh please is there something to keep my hair in?"
"Of course," said the barber, "why not use a tin?"

There was also one about a person who worked at a butchers, but I can't remember the lyrics, sorry.