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(Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice
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Subject: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Mrrzy Date: 25 Feb 02 - 02:12 PM OK, I'll take songs too... Do you, why do you, how do you, and are you medically trained? I remember in West Africa when I was a child hearing the screams of the children getting their lavages au piment (hot-pepper enemas) and I assume that the modern American puritanical kinds you can get in a drugstore are, well, at least not made out of hot pepper...??? |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: GUEST,Jim Date: 25 Feb 02 - 02:19 PM Sorry, I don't really understand. What exactly is your question? Jim |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Dave the Gnome Date: 25 Feb 02 - 02:19 PM I've heard the screams of kids getting their dose of Eminem as well - dreadful isn't it what people will do to innocent children;-) Mind you I've had one or two painful experiences after a night in Rusholmes curry mile. What on earth am I talking about? Who am I? You know I've seem some strange threads but... Cheers
Dave the Gnome |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: JenEllen Date: 25 Feb 02 - 02:21 PM Well, the ones we use at the clinic are a mixture of a generous amount of glycerin and warm water. I don't know about children, but a mastiff puppy who ate 4lbs of pea gravel was quite thankful for it. To add to musical content, here is a snippet of our clinic 'enema song':
Greasing the chute |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Mrrzy Date: 25 Feb 02 - 02:25 PM What's the tune? That's EXACTLY what I need... besides how do you get a 7-yo to, um, participate? |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: SharonA Date: 25 Feb 02 - 02:32 PM The enema of my enemy is my friend. |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: SINSULL Date: 25 Feb 02 - 02:44 PM MRRZY - what does your pediatrician recommend? A healthy seven year old shouldn't need an enema. |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: JenEllen Date: 25 Feb 02 - 02:44 PM The tune? More of a barbershop number (it takes at least two to hold a fractious blocked cat!) Here was the rest I could remember offhand...I'll have to ask around for the rest:
Greasing the chute
You've gotta go
Goin's been hard As far as getting a child to PARTICIPATE? Good luck. Best advice is to give him a hot bath and relax on his tummy someplace warm. Don't expect it to be fun, don't force anything, and if you are nervous, it will only bleed to him. I can't imagine it riotous fun, but at least you can impress on him that he will feel better if this works. |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Noreen Date: 25 Feb 02 - 02:59 PM Why? |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Mrs.Duck Date: 25 Feb 02 - 03:13 PM Having had five children I can honestly say I have never had to either use or administer an enema - is this an American thing and if so as Noreen said Why?? |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Fortunato Date: 25 Feb 02 - 03:38 PM If I was given a choice between kids & an enema, well, I think I'd take the enema. They don't grow up to be teenagers. |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: SharonA Date: 25 Feb 02 - 03:54 PM I don't know about that, Fortunato.... what about those hydrocortisone enemas, the ones you have to retain? At least kids leave home eventually! |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: MMario Date: 25 Feb 02 - 04:00 PM please! suppositories were bad enough! Mrzzy - pepper enamas? ohmygawd... |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Fortunato Date: 25 Feb 02 - 04:05 PM As the father of 4 boys 23 to 13, and an American, let me say this: "I've never, ever had need to give a child an enema". And I can't think of any circumstances in which I would.(ugh). SEE YOUR PEDATRICIAN FIRST. < |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: katlaughing Date: 25 Feb 02 - 04:28 PM Amen to that, Fortunato! My last was a preemie and had to have glycerin suppositories because she wasn't strong enough to go on her own, but that was only for about 6 weeks and under a doctor's care. I've never, ever had to do anything to keep my kids regular. I also can't believe I am posting to this. Thanks, Jenellen for the musical content.:-) |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: GUEST,Jim Date: 25 Feb 02 - 04:35 PM I guess some people find anal humor amusing. Having suffered an anal fissure, I'm not one of them. As the man said, don't open the threads you don't like Guess I should follow that advice Jim |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Mark Cohen Date: 25 Feb 02 - 04:55 PM Mrrzy, enemas are not standard treatment for children these days, though under certain circumstances they are useful...but definitely not without checking with a doctor. Feel free to PM me if you have a specific question; otherwise we should all probably let this thread slip slowly off the page... :-) Aloha, Mark |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Art Thieme Date: 25 Feb 02 - 05:12 PM With friends like you, I don't need e..... Art |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: RichM Date: 25 Feb 02 - 05:14 PM At last, a truly anal thread.... |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Bill D Date: 25 Feb 02 - 06:23 PM "I've never, ever had need to give a child an enema".. I have...like twice.(and he was about 6-7) Who knows why he got plugged up, but a SMALL dose of 'Fleet' (brand name) fixed him right up. How did we get him to cooperate?..explained that it would help him feel better!! Constipation is no joke-- I haven't had the problem in years now, but did have a 'few' times, and was glad there was a product that was simple and helpful. ...gee, some pretty emotional responses here! |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: GUEST,Jim Date: 25 Feb 02 - 06:27 PM Bill, If you'd had the type of pain I have... ...never mind Would just be a cue for more sniggering I expect Jim |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: catspaw49 Date: 25 Feb 02 - 06:28 PM The Doc has checked in! Thanks Mark. Spaw |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Bill D Date: 25 Feb 02 - 06:43 PM Jim...it wasn't your responses I was concerned with...sorry if it seemed like it. (and I hurt pretty bad a few times...though I don't doubt many have had it worse) I'm just fortunate that it's no longer a problem. (and we did indeed check with the Dr before using the treatment) |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: GUEST Date: 25 Feb 02 - 08:03 PM When I was a kid the kids in every house on our street had syrup of figs on Fraday WHETHER THEY NEEDED IT OR NOT Luckily my enlitened (and medically trained) mother spared me that. I've raised two of my own. Neither has ever been emenaed. The idea of shifters, especially for kids, when not ABSOLUTELY necessary seems strange to me. |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: kendall Date: 25 Feb 02 - 08:14 PM Art, you are a treasure! |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: X Date: 25 Feb 02 - 08:26 PM poop |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: technission Date: 25 Feb 02 - 08:47 PM more potty-humor *musical* content: From an old album by Firesign Theater, can't remeber which one - there was a "commercial" for "Loosener's Castor Oiul Flakes" ....I can't remember the spoken patter but the jingle was: Oooooh .. It ain't no use if you ain't got the boost The boost you get from Loosener's Looooosener's [spoken over outro: "The all-weather Breakfast Cereal"]
If the thread isn't enough for ya, go to your video store and rent "The Road to Wellville", at least it has Robin Williams in it. Sir Art already snagged the rimshot award for my intended > with friends like these, who needs .... |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Mrrzy Date: 26 Feb 02 - 10:39 AM With fronds like these, who needs anemones? It's the pediatrician who's prescribing the enemas. The symptom was a loss of bowel control (daily "accidents" when control had been fine for years), and I was wondering if it was a preemie thing with his lack of muscle tone, and was told No, he's SO constipated his colon is hugely enlarged ("acquired megacolon") so he can't tell if he needs to go or not, AND he's so full of hard backed up stuff that only some liquid can leak through anyway, both of which are why the accidents, and why the enemas. Although I have to admit when Willie was having headaches the doctor said the exact same thing and I didn't believe him and Will got better after having his tonsils out so he could breathe at night, and lo, no more headaches. So I also think the dr. may like prescribing enemas... Then again, maybe I should clean Willie out while I'm at it (no, don't go there, Spaw!)... Greasing the Chute, I shall sing tonight. Also someone recommended prune juice, which, as all trekkies know, is a Warrior's Drink. Tim might like that! |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Spartacus Date: 26 Feb 02 - 11:04 AM This whole thread needs an enema. Not a hot pepper enema, but maybe a nice mango and starfruit enema. Oh no, no, I've got it...a cabbage and shitake mushroom enema. That would be nice. Hey since we don't have a music theme here anymore, do any of you know a good podiatrist? I think I have a fungus....what about songs concerning podiatry? Gosh, I have so many questions... |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: GUEST,Nigel Parsons Date: 26 Feb 02 - 11:23 AM The only music link I can see here is a spoonerism of an Elvis opening line (Suspicious Minds) "I'm taut in a crap... |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Mrrzy Date: 26 Feb 02 - 12:24 PM Podiatry It ain't idolatry But if you have some hurtin fee T its my pleasure to refer to thee As needing podiatry... |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Art Thieme Date: 26 Feb 02 - 02:59 PM As I've told my friend Fern msny times, "With fronds like you, I don't need......" (pick a word from previous posts). Art Thieme |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: SharonA Date: 26 Feb 02 - 04:44 PM Is this how some kids get the nickname "Corky"? |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: John MacKenzie Date: 26 Feb 02 - 05:18 PM An enema for a child? Sounds like a fair swap to me!! Anybody got two enemas? |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Mark Cohen Date: 26 Feb 02 - 05:20 PM Mrrzy, some doctors do treat chronic constipation with enemas. I generally don't (there are alternatives), though I have in the past. The key point is that successful treatment of this condition takes MONTHS of persistence, but it is treatable--and it's a lot more common than most people realize. I'll forego a detailed explanation of chronic constipation and its treatment here (you're welcome, everybody), but would be happy to communicate with you by PM if you have questions. Aloha, Mark |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Noreen Date: 26 Feb 02 - 05:33 PM I knew there was something I liked about you, Mark... |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: John MacKenzie Date: 26 Feb 02 - 05:42 PM Have you tried working it out with a paper and pencil? Now there's one function that computers can't do!..Giok |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: GUEST,Nigel Parsons Date: 27 Feb 02 - 05:31 AM If it's too hard for pencil & paper then use logs! Second music bit( constipation songs vol. 2)..."T**ds don't come easy to me" In view of the subject matter of this thread(worm) I don't relly think its tone can be lowered! |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Mrrzy Date: 27 Feb 02 - 09:03 AM Hee Hee - I am reminded of a day back in the olden times, when I lived with a mechanically-minded person, who was being questioned about some work done for a neighbor. The neighbor was questioning the amount of time spent doing X versus Y, or something, and asked if records were kept of the hours. Now, I missed all that, and came into earshot just to hear the answer: You should see my daily log! And I about collapsed in hysterics imagining the neighbor coming in to inspect it each morning... |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Mark Cohen Date: 27 Feb 02 - 04:34 PM OK, you want music? There were five (five!) five (five!) constipated men In the Bible, in the Bible There were five (five!) five (five!) constipated men In the first five Books of Moses Now the first (first!) first (first!) constipated man was Cain, he wasn't able And the second...constipated man was Balaam, he couldn't move his ass And the third...constipated man was Moses, he took the tablets And the fourth...constipated man was Samson, he brought the house down And the fifth...constipated man was Solomon, he sat for forty years Aloha, Mark (Noreen, is that all?) |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Mrrzy Date: 27 Feb 02 - 04:41 PM Thanks Mark! |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: SharonA Date: 27 Feb 02 - 06:01 PM There's a thread about the constipated men, somewhere in the archives of this Forum, with more than five. Can't remember the exact title, though. |
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Subject: RE: (Sorry) kids & enemas helpful advice From: Noreen Date: 27 Feb 02 - 06:39 PM By no means, Mark- but I wouldn't want to be accused of thread drift. Mind you, given the nature of this thread...! |
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