BS: another use for viagra...

Subject: BS: another use for viagra...
From: red_clay
Date: 09 Nov 04 - 04:41 PM

my uncle told me that he drank a warm glass of milk and took one viagra pill every night before bedtime!
of course i asked why he mixed the two!
he explained to me that the warm milk helped him sleep,
and the viagra kept him from falling out of bed!

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: WFDU - Ron Olesko
Date: 09 Nov 04 - 04:53 PM

I am at the age where a little pill has done wonders for my lovelife. Thank God for No-Doze!

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: GUEST,Boab
Date: 09 Nov 04 - 05:01 PM

Can any of the Brains on site suggest how it may be used to prevent a constantly drooping boom-mike?

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Ebbie
Date: 09 Nov 04 - 07:50 PM

Boab, grab the nut and twist.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Hand-Pulled Boy
Date: 09 Nov 04 - 07:53 PM

Viagra eye drops make you look 'ard.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Dead Horse
Date: 10 Nov 04 - 11:28 AM

And if ya grab ya nuts and twist, it makes ya eyes water.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 10 Nov 04 - 11:41 AM

Viagra on your floppy disc turns it into a hard drive so beware.
Best wishes.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: JohnInKansas
Date: 10 Nov 04 - 11:56 AM

When viagra was new, an acquaintance (who happened to be an attorney) liked to tell people he'd tried it - but it just made him taller.

John

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 10 Nov 04 - 01:28 PM

If I was an attorney..I wouldn't stand for your remarks!
Best wishes.

I asked the Chemist.."This viagra I hear is really good..Can I get it over the counter"?
He said "You can if you take two"!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Sttaw Legend
Date: 10 Nov 04 - 01:38 PM

Take viagra with plenty of water - prevents you getting a stiff neck.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: jeffp
Date: 10 Nov 04 - 03:55 PM

And of course there's gingko viagra - so you can remember what the fuck you were doing.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: GUEST,UJ
Date: 17 Mar 06 - 10:02 AM

Ever since I sprained my wrist splittin' wood, my love-life has gone all to perdition! **{B>{(~

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: kendall
Date: 17 Mar 06 - 10:11 AM

This old git asked his doctor for Viagra, but the doctor told him, "Giving you Viagra would be like putting a new flagpole on a condemned building."

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Peace
Date: 17 Mar 06 - 10:15 AM

There was a hijacking in Montreal, yesterday, fof a truck carrying viagra. The police are looking for hardened criminals.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Peace
Date: 17 Mar 06 - 10:39 AM

My pet mouse ate a tablet . . . .

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 17 Mar 06 - 11:35 AM

They say Billy Connolly takes viagra before going on stage...perhaps why he's such a great 'stand up' comedian.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: gnu
Date: 17 Mar 06 - 01:15 PM

I hear the latest is that the worst side effects are stroke and, more commonly, blindness. There seems to be a running theme here.

That's if I read the article correctly, of course.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: kendall
Date: 17 Mar 06 - 08:29 PM

A friend of mine says he took a Viagra and an iron supplement at the same time and he stood pointing north for three days.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: frogprince
Date: 17 Mar 06 - 08:34 PM

"Stand up, stand up, for Je -sus...
   (I'm almost ashamed of myself for that).

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 17 Mar 06 - 09:08 PM

A flasher (on viagra, of course) stopped in front of three little old ladies on a park bench and opened his coat.

The first old woman looked at him and had a stroke.
The second old woman looked at him and had a stroke.
The third old woman looked at him but she couldn't reach that far.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 18 Mar 06 - 06:37 AM

Tighten your nuts and tape a weight to the other end to prevent drooping.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T
Date: 18 Mar 06 - 07:33 PM

Don't let your Dachshund get at it unless you live in a bungalow.

I hear also that the International Olympic Committee are considering banning its use by pole vaulters.

Don T

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: paddymac
Date: 18 Mar 06 - 09:13 PM

Tears of laughter - a mudcatter handle "Hand-Pulled Boy" on a Viagra thread.

Subject: BS: another use for vagina...
From: GUEST,Practical Phil
Date: 18 Mar 06 - 09:26 PM

my wife is going to go beserk tomorrow morning when she wakes up sober
and realises where I've stored the wrapped up leftovers
of our after closing time kebab,
to keep it safe and warm for tomorrows breakfast.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 19 Mar 06 - 01:27 AM

ewww. We don't want that one over here, either. Just dump it!

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: GUEST,Art Thieme
Date: 19 Mar 06 - 10:03 PM

I only slipped in here because I thought the name was Another Use For Vaginas.


Think I'll just slip back out again...
Art

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: JennyO
Date: 19 Mar 06 - 11:14 PM

Well Art, "GUEST, Practical Phil" up above did start a thread of that name, with a post the same as the one he posted here, but it was deleted. For some reason, his post has been left here on this thread.

Guess they thought it was a bit of a 'slippery' subject for a new thread :-)

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: GUEST,Art Thieme yet again...
Date: 20 Mar 06 - 12:01 AM

Time to go.

Artus Interruptus

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Peace
Date: 20 Mar 06 - 12:03 AM

"Practical Phil" up above did start a thread of that name, with a post the same as the one he posted here, but it was deleted. For some reason, his post has been left here on this thread.

Guess they thought it was a bit of a 'slippery' subject for a new thread :-)"

Tell me about it.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Peace
Date: 20 Mar 06 - 12:10 AM

That thread shoulda been called

"The Umpire Back Bites"

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: JennyO
Date: 20 Mar 06 - 12:56 AM

:-)

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 20 Mar 06 - 06:41 PM

At least this one is funny!

I wonder why Google is placing ads here for a fibromyalgia center and somthing called CPAP (what is CPAP?)

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Ebbie
Date: 20 Mar 06 - 08:10 PM

A night time 'harness' for sleep apnea sufferers, Stilly.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: kendall
Date: 21 Mar 06 - 07:48 PM

A woman went to see her husband in the burn ward, and she noticed that there was a note from his doctor for the nurse to give him Viagra. When thew nurse came around the woman was quite irritated, and she demanded to know why he was getting Viagra. The nurse said,

"It helps to keep the sheet off his legs.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Peace
Date: 21 Mar 06 - 07:54 PM

They finally released the ingredients in Viagra! 3% Vitamin E, 2% Aspirin, 2% Ibuprofen, 1% Vitamin C, 5% Spray Starch, 87% Fix-A-Flat.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: catspaw49
Date: 19 May 08 - 11:56 PM

Damn......What is this? Bad Viagra Joke Redux?   Well, if we're going to be using all this much Viagra on this thread, then maybe we need to order the generic version, Mycoxaphalin.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: EBarnacle
Date: 20 May 08 - 06:43 PM

Just remember the doctor who came up with the scientific study which led to viagra got the Nobel about 10 years ago.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: bobad
Date: 20 May 08 - 06:55 PM

New Use Pops Up For Viagara
Lisa LaMotta, 05.13.08, 6:00 PM ET

        Canadian researchers have found a whole new use for Viagra. It's for affairs of the heart, but not the bedroom kind.

A study released in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences on Monday by the University of Montreal and the Montreal Heart Institute showed that sildenafil, also known as Pfizer's Viagra, protected against some of the cardiac complications in mice with muscular dystrophy.

Muscular dystrophy, which affects one in 6,000 people, is a disease that causes the progressive breakdown of muscle tissue, including the heart.

Forbes.com

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Teribus
Date: 21 May 08 - 02:25 AM

Old guy goes to pick up a supply of Viagra from the Chemists.

Asks the Chemist if he could break each tablet into four equal pieces.

Chemist says certainly but if that is done the effect of the drug will be reduced and you will not get the full effect.

Old Guy says I only need to take it to stop myself pissing on my slippers.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Adrianel
Date: 24 May 08 - 10:24 PM

I read the other day that the UCI are thinking of banning Viagra for cyclists as it gives some people better exercise tolerance at altitude. Their motto seems to be "if a job's worth doing, it's worth overdoing", but I come across a lot of that in the US these days.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Rog Peek
Date: 25 May 08 - 11:10 AM

An old couple in their eighties were sat one afternoon, when the old fella' suddenly stood up and started to put his coat on.
"Where are you going?" his wife asked him.
"I'm off to see the doctor." he said.
"Why are you going to the doctor?" she asked.
"I'm off to get some of that Viagra." He replied.
At that, she stood up and started to put her coat on.
"Where are you going?" he asked.
"I'm off to see the doctor." she said.
"Why are you going to the doctor?" he asked.
"Well," she said, "If you're going to get that rusty old thing out again, I'm going to get a tetanus shot!"

Rog

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Gurney
Date: 25 May 08 - 06:16 PM

My wife threw the Viagra out into the garden.



I don't need bean-sticks this year.





Is it a coincidence that the ads under my 'reply' box are 'Meet Girls in New Zealand' and "Eye Surgery Specialists?'
Honestly.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 25 May 08 - 06:21 PM

An Old Man Came Courting Me

(With a couple newer verses)

An old man came courting me, hey dingdorum ay,
An old man came courting me, me being young,
An old man came courting me, all for his wife to be,
Maids when you're young, never wed an old man.

CHORUS: For he's got no falorum, fal-diddle-orum,
       He's got no falorum, fal-diddle-i-ay,
       He's got no falorum, he's lost his dingdorum,
       Maids when you're young, never wed an old man.

When this old man comes to bed, hey dingdorum ay,
When this old man comes to bed, me being young,
When this old man comes to bed, he lays like a lump of lead,
Maids when you're young, never wed an old man.

When this old man goes to sleep, hey dingdorum ay,
When this old man goes to sleep, me being young,
When this old man goes to sleep, out of bed I do creep,
Into the arms of a handsome young man.

I wish this old man would die, hey dingdorum ay,
I wish this old man would die, me being young,
I wish this old man would die, I'd make the money fly,
Girls for your sake, never wed an old man.

A young man is my delight, hey dingdorum ay,
A young man is my delight, me being young,
A young man is my delight, he'll kiss you day and night,
Maids when you're young, never wed an old man.

* Alternate last 3 verses adapted from Julian Flood *

Off to the doctor go, hey dingdorum ay
Off to the doctor go, me being young
Off to the doctor go, tell him your tale of woe -
Maids when you're young can you wed an old man?

Now he's got Viagra, hi-iddle-hi-agra
He's got Viagra, hi-iddle-hi-ay,
When he takes Viag-a-ra he comes like Niagara -
Maids when you're young you CAN wed an old man.

CHORUS: Now he's got his falorum, fal-diddle-orum,
       He's got his falorum, fal-diddle-i-ay,
       He's got his falorum, he's found his dingdorum,
       Now maids when you're young, you can wed an old man.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: john f weldon
Date: 26 May 08 - 10:31 AM

Reminds me of this old bit of dialogue from the Goons...

Min: Did you take your hormone pills?
Henry: I've taken my hormone pills, Min.
Min: Ooooooo, Henry.
Henry: Without them, I'd never have the strength to fall asleep.

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Art Thieme
Date: 26 May 08 - 07:27 PM

We went to Viagra Falls for our honeymoon...

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: Art Thieme
Date: 26 May 08 - 07:32 PM

It's a good reason to wear socks with my sandals. A good place to stash my Viagra.

Art

Subject: RE: BS: another use for viagra...
From: katlaughing
Date: 26 May 08 - 11:40 PM

Keep 'em coming, folks. (No pun intended!) My Rog and I are enjoying them. LOL!