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Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right!
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Subject: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Rick Fielding Date: 08 Aug 01 - 01:22 PM Well, if you're lookin' for something else to tar and feather us hapless Canadians with (apart from being Commie/Pinko/Castro lovin'/Health-care providin'/Peace-keepin'/politeness-freaks) HERE IT IS: Ontario sprinter Venolyn Clarke has been busted for taking ANABOLIC STEROIDS! Good Gawd woman, the rest of the Olympic athletes abandoned Stanozolol YEARS ago! Venolyn, does the name "Ben Johnson" mean ANYTHING to you? Now, needless to say, her coaches and fellow athletes saw nothing unusual in this 34 year old woman with the upper physique of Mike Tyson. Heck, I'm sure they believed that it was her use of "Eastern Philosophy" that produced those biceps. The moustache was probably just a result of overuseing her Richard Simmons "Sweatin' to the Oldies" videos! Anyway, she's gone (imagine how she'll explain this to the high school kids she teaches), not because she cheated, but because she used such archaic (and presumably less expensive) methods. The Olympic world must be chuckling today. Can you just imagine the surprises in store for the 2004 Beijing Extravaganza? Wanna bet that those Chinese guys and gals are gonna be bigger, faster, (and a lot hairier) than before? And thanks to (really) modern chemistry, they won't get caught either. By the way, the Brit Press really trashed Venolyn today....but never even mentioned Lynford Christie. Hmmmmm. Rick (drug-free....at the moment)
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Gary T Date: 08 Aug 01 - 01:54 PM Aw, I wouldn't hold this against Canadians. The fact that you're all Commie/Pinko/Castro lovin'/Health-care providin'/Peace-keepin'/politeness-freaks is enough in itself. (BG, of course!) |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Don Firth Date: 08 Aug 01 - 02:41 PM I've thought a couple of times about moving to Canada. I kinda fond of Commie/Pinko/Castro lovin'/Health-care providin'/Peace-keepin'/politeness-freaks. Vancouver's a beautiful city. So's Victoria. Couple of other places I've seen are pretty nice too. I may be wrong, but I have the feeling that there would be less chance of my being run down and left bleeding in the street by some SOB in an SUV with a cell-phone up his ear. Don Firth |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: GUEST Date: 08 Aug 01 - 03:12 PM No, Don. You'll still get run over. But if you don't die, we'll buy you a beer later. |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Devilmaster Date: 08 Aug 01 - 03:14 PM Whoops! That was me, if anyone really cares. |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Peter T. Date: 08 Aug 01 - 08:03 PM Can you imagine anything so stupid. The same stupid drug Ben Johnson used. As one commentator said, Flash, Canadian athletes discover sneakers. Pathetic. |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: GUEST,Phillip Date: 08 Aug 01 - 09:16 PM At least when Ben Johnson cheated, he had the good sense to ACTUALLY win the gold medal race. Poor Venolyn came in dead last! Isn't it possible to do that without cheating...? |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Rick Fielding Date: 08 Aug 01 - 10:04 PM You know despite being sarcastic to the max in my post, I actually feel quite angry at the team leaders, trainers and managers. This gal seems totally humiliated and is (naturally) saying "I didn't do it, etc", but WHY was she allowed to mess with that stuff? I've done a bit of net-surfing, and really the methods currently used (they ALL use them...what's their option?) are virtually undetectable. My guess is that she'll be shunned by the rest of the team. Quite sad actually. Rick P.S. If anyone thinks I'm being overly cynical by saying "what's their option?" several sports people claim that an athlete not using ANY performance enhancing drugs would be so far out of the medal hunts (in several sports) that their countries would be embarrassed to be represented by them. Oi Vay!
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: GUEST,Roger the skiffler Date: 09 Aug 01 - 04:16 AM This (without comment from me!) from today's UK Telegraph Online: Athletics reporter runs into trouble with the locals By Sally Pook THE image of Canada as a clean, civilised but ever-so-slightly dull country is one of those enduring national stereotypes, acknowledged on the quiet even by Canadians themselves. But, it seems, even the famously tolerant Canadian populace has a breaking point. That point was reached this week when Robert Philip, who is covering the World Athletics Championships in Edmonton for The Telegraph, chose to commit his thoughts on the city to paper. Rebranding the Alberta capital "Deadmonton", he called it a "visually unappealing corner of Canada" whose charms were "less than obvious". Yesterday he awoke to find himself the most reviled person between Newfoundland and British Columbia. "Brit Snit!," screamed the front page of the Edmonton Sun. "Deadmontonians rally after snub," said the national Globe and Mail. "Cowardly critic should be ashamed," said the Edmonton Journal. Yesterday, national television crews were flocking to his hotel to get a glimpse of the man with the poison pen. The Premier of Alberta, Ralph Klein, joined in the attack, describing Philip as "probably mad", even though Klein himself once said that "Edmonton isn't the end of the world, it's just easier to see it from there". Yesterday, Philip was unrepentant, saying he stood by his words, although he regretted causing offence. "It was supposed to be a humorous piece but perhaps humour does not travel," he said. "I woke up this morning to find my picture all over the newspapers. I am public enemy number one." Asked how he would spend his remaining days in the city, Philip replied: "There are only two tourist attractions in Edmonton - the shopping mall and, of course, the mall's underground car park. I can't wait."
Athletics reporter runs into trouble with the locals By Sally Pook (Filed: 09/08/2001) THE image of Canada as a clean, civilised but ever-so-slightly dull country is one of those enduring national stereotypes, acknowledged on the quiet even by Canadians themselves. But, it seems, even the famously tolerant Canadian populace has a breaking point. That point was reached this week when Robert Philip, who is covering the World Athletics Championships in Edmonton for The Telegraph, chose to commit his thoughts on the city to paper. Rebranding the Alberta capital "Deadmonton", he called it a "visually unappealing corner of Canada" whose charms were "less than obvious". Yesterday he awoke to find himself the most reviled person between Newfoundland and British Columbia. "Brit Snit!," screamed the front page of the Edmonton Sun. "Deadmontonians rally after snub," said the national Globe and Mail. "Cowardly critic should be ashamed," said the Edmonton Journal. Yesterday, national television crews were flocking to his hotel to get a glimpse of the man with the poison pen. The Premier of Alberta, Ralph Klein, joined in the attack, describing Philip as "probably mad", even though Klein himself once said that "Edmonton isn't the end of the world, it's just easier to see it from there". Yesterday, Philip was unrepentant, saying he stood by his words, although he regretted causing offence. "It was supposed to be a humorous piece but perhaps humour does not travel," he said. "I woke up this morning to find my picture all over the newspapers. I am public enemy number one." Asked how he would spend his remaining days in the city, Philip replied: "There are only two tourist attractions in Edmonton - the shopping mall and, of course, the mall's underground car park. I can't wait." RtS |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: GUEST,Roger the skiffler Date: 09 Aug 01 - 05:42 AM ...and some bloody stupid Limeys can't even cut 'n' paste without making a bog of it! Sorry for the double pasting and unintended bold in the last post. RtS |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Steve Latimer Date: 09 Aug 01 - 08:55 AM Well, he does have a point. |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: GUEST,John Leeder Date: 09 Aug 01 - 11:25 AM Re the doping: Some commentators are putting on the spin that Canada is one of the few countries that actually is serious about the anti-doping regulations, so more Canadians get caught because most other countries don't make a real effort to catch their cheaters. One person said, "If Ben Jonson had been American, he would never have been disqualified." Re "Deadmonton", as a Calgarian I'm not really allowed to say nice things about Edmonton, but there's a bit of a folk music scene there, so it can't be all bad. Also, this writer doesn't really say what the comment is based on, but if he's talking about a lack of night clubs, who cares? That's a positive, in my book. However, in the original column, the "Deadmonton" word was a quote from an unnamed British athlete, and no reasons were given for it. Re the "visually unappealing" comment, the writer has since confessed that he hasn't actually had time to see much of the city. Guess he was just trashing it on general principles, to make the folks back home feel smug. |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: GUEST,Phillip Date: 09 Aug 01 - 12:10 PM I do know one thing for sure! Edmonton's stadium looks a lot better than London's! (who wants to host the 2005 championships) Why? Because it hasn't been built yet! Picketts Lock construction has not started and shows no sign of doing so. Berlin has been placed on standby notice just in case... Brit Minister of Sport Richard Caborn says there's a "real concern about the United Kingdom's ability to deliver major events." So I don't mind if the British press slags off Canada and/or Edmonton. Their words may come back to bite them. The British organizing committee has shown a lack of organizational ability when it comes to doing, but the British press is second to none when it comes to fault-finding. Gold medal to Britain! |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: GUEST Date: 10 Aug 01 - 12:42 AM Edmonton is mind numbingly boring....no architecture, no sense of proportion and dull to the nth.. |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Steve Latimer Date: 10 Aug 01 - 03:01 AM Guest, It sure looks good when compared to Winnipeg though. |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: GUEST,Roger the skiffler Date: 10 Aug 01 - 08:35 AM Actually, this makes Edmonton sound quite interesting! Mascots get too much stick
These are dangerous times for Tracker and Fielder
By BBC Sport Online's Tom Fordyce in Edmonton You might even find their big glassy eyes and mute clowning slightly sinister, or maybe that's just me. But it's unlikely you'd be so angered or scared that you'd be moved to whack them over the head with an ice hockey stick. Sad to report, that's the fate that has befallen Tracker and Fielder, the red wolf and yellow bear whose job it is to entertain children and embarrass adults at the World Athletics Championships. The pair are now accompanied by minders wherever they go after an ugly incident on their promotional tour leading up to the championships. They were drop-kicked and two-handed over the head with the hockey stick in second most distressing incident yet associated with Edmonton 2001. In first place remains the moment at the conclusion of the men's marathon on Friday night, when Ahmed Adam Saleh crossed the finish line and promptly threw his guts up everywhere. France's Larbi Zeroual, finishing just behind, was too shattered to look up and promptly walked right through Saleh's technicolour welcome mat.
Maybe Tracker and Fielder got off lightly. A few weeks ago, Root Bear, the mascot of local grid-iron team the Edmonton Eskimos, was beaten up after a game and carried from the stadium on a stretcher. (c)BBC ONline RtS |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: GUEST,Phillip Date: 10 Aug 01 - 10:27 AM Short list of activities in and around Deadmonton as of the last two weeks. Klondike Days: Edmonton's summer fair. Paid attendance to grounds 700,000+ World Triathlon Championships: Capacity crowds in the facilities as well as lining the streets, Blueberry Bluegrass Festival: Canada's largest. Over 5,000 3-day passes were sold. Featuring "The Seldom Scene" as headliners. Heritage Days: 2-day Multicultural event . Absolutely free to all. An explosion of ethnic dance, food, and music casually referred to as the world's largest food court. Big Valley Jamboree: 4-day country music festival. Also Canada's largest. Over 60,000 paid weekend admissions, most of which were weekend passes. Festival of The World's: Continuing nightly free concerts in a downtown park in conjunction with the track & field championships. Every night a different theme of music, aboriginal, country, classical, Celtic. Rita Coolidge, Paul Brandt, The Edmonton Symphony, have been featured. Edmonton Folk Fest: Started last night. Tickets limited to 40,000, weekend admissions. Traditionally sold out within hours of tickets going on sale in May. Average evening crowd is 15,000-25,000 people Last night's headliners were Dougie MacLean, Ron Kavana & Niamh Parsons, Oysterband, Joan Osborne, and Jennifer Warnes. Way more to come over next three days. To come this evening and weekend: Edmonton Symphony Orchestra: World's Gala & Concert. featuring guest artist Pinchas Zukerman and Amanda Forsyth. Joe Cocker and the "Guess Who" reunion tour. All this in addition to the World Track & Field Championships themselves. Which have 400,000 PAID admissions. No plans to give away free tickets to pad the crowd as they did in Seville. For a small city, Edmonton seems to support it's events very well. I haven't mentioned the usual plethora of country fairs, rodeos, sport tournaments, and other small regional musical events. I don't think the theatres, restaurants, and clubs of Edmonton have been hurting lately either. I note with interest that the mayor of Edmonton took Mr. Philip, who filed the controversial story, on a helicopter tour of Edmonton yesterday. It's good to see him get out a little bit. The British contingent has been spotted mostly in their hotel and surrounding pubs when they are not actually at the stadium. Not apt to sample too much of the local culture from in there! I find it pretentious for anyone to travel and then complain that "It's not like it is at home!" |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Whiskeyjack Date: 10 Aug 01 - 12:07 PM |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: GUEST,John Leeder Date: 10 Aug 01 - 12:29 PM I missed the mascot story, Roger -- thanks! I wish somebody had assaulted Heidi & Howdy, the embarrassingly bad mascots of the Calgary '88 Olympics who still show up at things occasionally just to keep us cringing. |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Grab Date: 10 Aug 01 - 12:48 PM Phillip, what's the bets that the mayor was offering the reporter a single free flying lesson, out of the helicopter? An offer he couldn't refuse indeed... ;-) Graham. |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Rick Fielding Date: 10 Aug 01 - 01:04 PM Well my experiences in Edmonton have nothing to do with Steroids, Massacred Mascots, disaffected British reporters or even the world's largest shopping Mall (it hadn't been built then) I DID learn a lot however. Back in the stone age when I was young and naieve, I spent eight weeks in Edmonton playing folk clubs and Pizza parlours. While there, I lived in a small rooming house operated by Edmonton's classiest Call Girl. She and I were the only residents who kept "alternative hours" and in those wee hours when she was "winding down" she entertained me with some truly amazing stories about the human condition. She had a stranger clientele than I did...that's for sure. Steve. You're a brave man. It HAD to be said. Ha Ha! My ex lives in Winnipeg....I can only hope I didn't drive her there! Rick |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Steve Latimer Date: 10 Aug 01 - 02:00 PM Rick, I've said it before, but one day you'll have to write an autobiography. This is just another chapter. Steve |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Dicho (Frank Staplin) Date: 10 Aug 01 - 03:15 PM One thing that must be said for Edmonton, they have kept large stretches of their riverbank treed and attractive. Sure, it is just another prairie town (actually parkland but no one outside of Alberta knows what that means), but the same can be said for most American and Canadian towns. With a metropolitan area of over a million, all of the usual vices are there, from prostitutes to symphony orchestras and folk festivals. Of course, it helps to speak Ukrainian when you visit (old Calgary joke). |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: GUEST,John Leeder Date: 11 Aug 01 - 01:43 PM The distancing has started; this morning a commentator referred to "Jamaica's Venolyn Clarke". (Many Canadian track stars, especially sprinters, emigrated here from the West Indies, or their parents did.) |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Rick Fielding Date: 11 Aug 01 - 01:56 PM John, I was waiting for that!!! Ben Johnson went from a Canadian Hero to a "Jamaican" so fast in the press I couldn't believe it. Rick |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Dicho (Frank Staplin) Date: 11 Aug 01 - 03:39 PM I don't know about coverage of the games elsewhere, but the local Conrad Black paper doesn't even give all the results for the previous day's events. They did print a typical bad taste cartoon of Clarke (looked like a hippo). |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: CRANKY YANKEE Date: 11 Aug 01 - 04:28 PM Hey Rick, I almost moved to Lunenburg, Nova Scotia in 1970, when we became really fond of the commie/pinko/Castro Lovin'/healthcare providing/peace keeping/politeness freak, shipwrights who built the replica (exactly accurate) of H.M.S. Rose at the Smith and Ruland Shipyard in Lunenburg. The original Rose was a 20 gun British Warship, flagship of the fleet that hung out in Newport, Rhode Island. Donna (Mrs Gibson) and I rigged the Rose and trained her first crew. We were the only two (including Capt Byerly) with any extensive experience with Square Rigged sailing craft. (rigged "square to the mast" as opposed to "fore and aft" of the mast). Annyway, we loved Lunenburg and the people there loved us. We discovered that the very shipwrights who had built "Bluenose" when they were youngsters, as well as "Bluenose II" and "The Bounty", built our " Rosie". For you "Non Canadians, "Bluenose" is the schooner depicted on the reverse side of the Canadian Dime. It's kind of nice to be that closely connected to the coinage of a "World Class" , highly respected nation like Canada. We found it to be anything but boring. regards, Jody and Donna. |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Rick Fielding Date: 11 Aug 01 - 05:29 PM You'd have been a welcome addition Cranky. Actually we're not THAT boring, we just don't want the States to start noticing us TOO much! Ha Ha! Why don't you start a thread on "The Rose", and "The Bluenose". (unless it's already been done) Could be interesting. Rick |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: McGrath of Harlow Date: 11 Aug 01 - 07:45 PM Well, Edmonton looks all right from what I could see on the net - any place with a decent folk festival is all right by me, and I see Edmonton's got one on this week. |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Dicho (Frank Staplin) Date: 11 Aug 01 - 07:58 PM Mcgrath, also a great Fringe Festival with performers from everywhere. |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: GUEST,John Leeder Date: 17 Aug 01 - 04:19 PM Just saw Venolyn Clarke interviewed; she's saying she never used drugs, and doesn't understand how she could test positive. Her spokesperson is saying that either the test was inaccurate or someone planted drugs in her food. The fact that either of the latter things might be possible says even more horrible things about the state of track & field than the possibility that one athlete cheated. |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Peter T. Date: 17 Aug 01 - 06:19 PM Gosh, comes to her own defence at last a whole two weeks later. Pretty standard behaviour for someone who is innocent. The whole thing is so pathetic. yours, Peter T. |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: Rick Fielding Date: 17 Aug 01 - 06:23 PM Guess she hadn't noticed those huge bulging biceps developing so suddenly this year. Bet she's also very pissed that the other COMPETITIVE athletes, timed their medications better. Rick |
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Subject: RE: Canuckleheads can't even Cheat right! From: GUEST,Phillip Date: 05 Oct 01 - 09:20 PM To the British Press: I note with interest that the 2005 World Track & Field Championships have today, Oct. 5, 2001, been pulled from London, England, despite PM Tony Blair's repeated assurances that the city would be able to stage the event. Sport Minister Richard Cabon now admits that the British cannot come up with the money to build the new stadium, Pickett's Lock. Nor even with the money to refurbish and reopen Wembley Stadium. This after the British press was so critical of Edmonton less than 2 months ago when the games were held here, sniffing that the games should be held in a "major world city," not some "provincial outpost". He who laughs last,... |
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